My Friend Irma (1949) - Opening Theme Lyrics: My Friend Irma says "Bird Dogs are a lie I bought a pup and he grew up But he never learned to fly" My Friend Irma says "A meatball is a dance Where the lonesome butchers go When looking for romance" She bought a clock last summer But now her wall is blank She heard of daylight saving time And took it right to the bank My Friend Irma lives in a world apart But men prefer their dates with her She makes them feel so smart Maybe My Friend Irma Is not so very dumb at heart